Wild Goose Chasing

On Boxing day morning, Saturday 26 December, early, the rest of the house sleeping, Debbie and I talked about how we anticipate events at times. I spoke about my habit of sinking into the dread and how I now consciously decide that I am going to have a great time, all will be good and to expect the best. This was to be tested somewhat that day as I travelled to California for the Wild Goose Chinese Medical Qigong five day retreat led by Dr Hu.


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Sunday 27^th December 2009

Long journey yesterday – Debbie took me to the airport, we had a sightly circular journey once we found terminal 5, the signposting being rather obscure. All seemed to be going OK with checking in and the security slalom until the directive came forth from USA that all passengers had to have a 100% search: luggage, body, shoes, everything. So this took over two hours for a whole plane load to be searched by three security people. Once the plane was loaded and ready for the off the captain came on and told us that there was a fault that they had been working on since 6 o'clock that morning but still not fixed, so we had to change planes. And that took another two hours. The turkey sandwich I had brought with me from our wonderful Christmas lunch together was very welcome as lunch was not served until well into our journey – and I hadn't had any brekky being full from previous day's feast. Amazingly this searching and changing planes (nice bus ride round Heathrow) all happened without too much grumpiness from the packed plane. So didn't arrive at LA until 5.30pm, not the scheduled 1.35pm, and now past 1am UK time. By this time I had decided that if I felt awful I would find a hotel near the airport and sleep there and drive to Santa Barbara in the morning.

Got to Avis, it is outside the airport, they had coaches picking people up a the terminal. I decided I needed a sat nav to get me to Santa Barbara, and to drive there that evening, not LA hotel. I am glad I did have the electronic voice of Garmin speaking to me as the route out of LA was rather complicated, and being in the dark even more so. Huge freeways with cars whizzing along at a rate of knots far exceeding the M4, which I had driven down to the Williams in Isleworth with the hot and just cooked turkey on Christmas Day sitting in a cool box o the back seat. And the time given on the Garmin Sat Nav for my journey would have meant me going at 80 mph all the way. I didn't. Arrived here at The Mission Renewal Center at about 8.30pm. Took me a while to find a way in, drove a round, tried a few doors, then someone came out of the building. She said she was an attendant when I said I was there for the Wild Goose Seminar. I immediately thought of Kate as Lama Samten's attendant, took me a wee while to sort out that she meant attendant of the seminar too. She rang one of the residents, seems you need a phone at night to gain access and as I don't have one here... Both very kind. Managed to get a cup of tea (brought my own tea bags) and then collapsed into a very nice bed in a semi-decent but not en suite, room.

Slept not badly at all. And now showered, tea-ed and about to go to breakfast, ready for the first day. It is sunny, a bit of chill outside, fresh more than cold, I can wear my sandals with ease. And will now launch myself into the week with interest and expectation of having the most amazing time.

And it has been so far too: including the ludicrous directive from USA security that all passengers have to be in landing mode: seats upright, baggage all stowed away, nothing, not even a blanket on their laps, and no visits to the bathroom, for the hour before landing at LA. What do you think we might have been doing for the past nine hours? The moving map facility on the TV was also not functioning, as all on states bound flights. PS to this bit:I had a look at the BBC news and saw that there had been an incident on a plane just before it was to land in Detroit. Explanation of one hour before landing directive.

After lunch:

Wonderful food here, freshly cooked and loads of fruit and vegetables.

Pearls from this morning's opening session: Form is the frame work. Correct, not correct, neither useful. All is different, change is creativity. Relaxation is the core. If you want to get something then you will jump a little for it! Dancing with gravity. Shift weight using gravity. Circular movement, whole body, even ankles, to build up body qi, 3 dimensional circular movements. Vibration is important for healing. Awareness: movement, breathing awareness. Let body naturally stretch a little. Notice which part of the body is tight, which loose and alternate.

Wild Goose X1 is one of the more complicated forms, stuffed full of different mudras. Dr Hu's accent is somewhat impenetrable at times. One mudra I heard as the Goblet mudra, and is the gall bladder! In the introduction this morning some very interesting people. I know I have come somewhere that is going to inspire when I walk into a conversation over breakfast about the kabbala and Spain and mysticism! And its sunny and mild too.

This afternoon I began to feel a tad weary, my ability to take in what Dr Hu was talking about or expecting us to follow faded. Also the room we are working in, a very nice large and airy room, has a very beautiful stone floor. But stone, which is very tiring on the legs. We spent the first part of the session receiving information on what qigong is: qi = energy with information. Dr Hu poo-pooed those who can break a brick with their hands etc, saying he was far more interested in healing and maintaining the mind. He told us that a lot of illness is caused by too little oxygen getting to the brain, he has emphasised breathing a lot today, especially the reverse breathing. We seem to have done quite a lot of Wild Goose X1, also called the Self Cultivation form, as in not expecting others to help but to be able to help ourselves. We also went through Wild Goose 6, which has a lot of slapping, qi scattering. Nice to do when feeling a bit groggy.

There is a point in Wild Goose X1 when the forefinger is put into the large intestine point near the elbow. It hurt, and after ten hours of flying and an eight hour time difference, know my gut is in a recovery/change mode!

Moving Home

I have developed some survival techniques during the past few months to protect myself from too many probing questions. Especially questions that reflect another's fear for what I am planning - and acting on. My response to any well-meaning friend who wishes to investigate all the inevitable problems that can arise when making a change is "Stop right there!" I know that if I don't focus on what is good and positive my fear will freeze me and prevent me from moving on. I recognise that these friends mean well, but often it is their fear and not mine. And believe me, I have enough fears of my own without collecting any more.

Yes, making changes, huge changes. Moving house, moving place, changing way of living. Not much change on one level, a lot on another. At first it all happened very rapidly. My sister, Jeanne, and I decided to sell up and find somewhere we could run residential retreats and courses. And somewhere big enough that would allow growth if others wishes to join us and start living in community. We found somewhere after a lot of driving round Devon, Cornwall and Wales. After lengthy negotiations - and ensuring that both our own properties were under offer, a prerequisite demanded by the vendor - our offer on the property that would suit our purpose was accepted. We were underway, with a move planned for early May. Even though the vendors of our desired property had wished for an earlier completion.

What they hadn't done was find anywhere for them to move to. A slight oversight if ever there was one! They had demanded that we both had our properties under offer before they would negotiate. Which we did, well, our estate agents did. Then when we started to be pushed by our purchasers into naming a completion date we realised that the vendors of the Welsh place had nowhere to go. We offered to look after their sheep, suggested they rent to give them more flexibility. But flexibility was not what they desired.

On realising that these vendors, who had told us that they wished to move in March and had baulked at our more realistic suggestion of May would not be ready to move by June, at the earliest, we started to reflect on whether they really wished to move at all. Our decision was to move our completion dates back to the end of May. Something we regretted and also our purchasers, they had wished to move before then. Instead, we will rent somewhere when our properties have been sold and start the hunt all over again.

Any major change will attract obstacles. They are a gift, making us dive deeper into our own intentions and purpose. So here we go: China this week - and where at the end of May? Does anyone have a wee flat, house or cottage we can rent whilst we start looking again? Would be two careful tenants.